redemption. boiler room. 2012.

the fan buzzes, and redemption seeps in from this room. there is no pain anymore. one window propped open by a wine bottle, another painted shut, one open with the winter storm window down. I remember when this was home. When I left hastily, packing my boxes and escaping to Byron Center where a dear family awaited me with open arms. I can see that family now out of the windows that are propped, painted and winterized shut. I had left hoping to be able to clear my mind and found myself in despair, had to once again teach myself how to sleep and how to believe that Jesus heard me as I cried out, and how to believe that someday someone would want to be with me. I can now see the house that will soon be my home out of the windows that are propped, painted and winterized shut. and I can see my tall one hollering from his porch at Kevin or clicking the fence open to come in. he is my tall one and in 14 days, we will be wed. Brooke has slept lived in this room, also: emily, chelsea T, charla, and now I am sleeping here. I am not escaping this time, I am back for two weeks with full knowledge of the redemption God has allowed to take place (by his grace!)

as I rejoin this tiny, crummy, crumbled, real, beautiful neighborhood. with my hand in His.

and his.